Letting go and being real

So, it's 2am and I'm wide awake. 

This means that when I need to be waking up this morning...say 7am 

That I'll be dog tired.

I took some medicine last night and think it's messed up my sweet slumber.

It doesn't help that there is much on my mind.

I've had a great start to my 2014 but have also made a major decision 

that was a long time coming.

I'm am an impossible optimist which is why it's taken so long.

I believe it is also how I made it through my tough childhood.

An optimist with a short memory.

God knew what he was doing.

I've tried for years to jump start my memory and it's better 

But it's what kept me sane.

Are there people in your life that you need to let go and disconnect?

It's a tough thing to do, especially if it's family.

And...

As much as family is important to me it's time for me

to stop 

Making excuses for them and stop acting like their action don't hurt

Me and start living without them. 

Honestly, they won't even realize until they want something 

Or unless they need to blame me for something I had nothing to do with.

Sad but true-

It hurts my heart to come to terms with this but as much

As it hurts now, I know it's what needs to be done.

I'll love and pray from a distance.

Unwind:

To be blunt...Reality is that sometimes reality sucks.

But living in a fantasy world is not how I plan to live.